Therapy Cullen Family
by edward6234
Summary: Cullens and Bella go to therapy. Human doctor so a lot is misunderstood. Please read it is a lot better then that sounds. I think!


Therapy ~ Cullen Family And Bella Swan diagnoses.

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or any of that Stephenie Meyer does. But I do own Dr. Raven and his wife Ruby. I made then up.

Summery: Cullens and Bella go to therapy. Human doctor so a lot is misunderstood.

~Single diagnoses~

Angrophobia - Fear of anger or of becoming angry. ~ EsmeCholerophobia- Fear of anger or the fear of cholera. ~ Esme

Ataxophobia- Fear of disorder or untidiness. ~ Esme

Iophobia- Fear of poison. ~ Edward

Panthophobia- Fear of suffering and disease. ~ Edward

Demonophobia or Daemonophobia- Fear of demons. ~ Edward

Peccatophobia- Fear of sinning or imaginary crimes. ~ Edward

Hamartophobia- Fear of sinning. ~ Edward

Hadephobia- Fear of hell. ~ EdwardStygiophobia or Stigiophobia- Fear of hell. ~ Edward

Zelophobia- Fear of jealousy. ~ Edward

Dystychiphobia- Fear of accidents. ~ EdwardErotophobia- Fear of sexual love or sexual questions. ~ Edward

Genophobia- Fear of sex. ~ Edward

Ithyphallophobia- Fear of seeing, thinking about or having an erect penis. ~ Edward

Chronophobia- Fear of time. ~ Bella

Gerascophobia- Fear of growing old. ~ Bella

Gerontophobia- Fear of old people or of growing old. ~ Bella

Rhytiphobia- Fear of getting wrinkles. ~ Bella

Eisoptrophobia- Fear of mirrors or of seeing oneself in a mirror. ~ Bella

Social Phobia- Fear of being evaluated negatively in social situations. ~ Bella

Doxophobia- Fear of expressing opinions or of receiving praise. ~ Bella

Catagelophobia- Fear of being ridiculed. ~ Bella

Gelotophobia- Fear of being laughed at. ~ Bella

Ophthalmophobia- Fear of being stared at. ~ Bella

Ereuthrophobia- Fear of blushing. ~ Bella

Tachophobia- Fear of speed. ~ Bella

Aichmophobia- Fear of needles or pointed objects. ~ BellaChorophobia- Fear of dancing. ~ BellaGamophobia- Fear of marriage. ~ Bella

Onomatophobia- Fear of hearing a certain word or of names. ~ Bella

Claustrophobia- Fear of confined spaces. ~ Jasper Anthropophobia- Fear of people or society ~ Jasper

Anuptaphobia- Fear of staying single. ~ Rose

Medomalacuphobia- Fear of losing an erection. ~ Emmett

Asthenophobia- Fear of fainting or weakness. ~ Emmett

~Paired diagnoses~

Ouranophobia or Uranophobia- Fear of heaven. ~ Edward/Bella

Uranophobia or Ouranophobia- Fear of heaven. ~ Edward/Bella

Textophobia- Fear of certain fabrics. ~ Bella/Alice

Atelophobia- Fear of imperfection. ~ Esme/Alice

Demophobia- Fear of crowds. (Agoraphobia) ~ Jasper/Bella

~Group diagnoses~

Atychiphobia- Fear of failure ~ Emmett/Jasper/Alice

Kakorrhaphiophobia- Fear of failure or defeat. ~

Edward/Emmett/Jasper/Alice

Clinophobia- Fear of going to bed. ~ Cullens

Hypnophobia- Fear of sleep or of being hypnotized. ~ Cullens

Somniphobia- Fear of sleep. ~ Cullens

Heliophobia- Fear of the sun. ~ Cullens

Phengophobia- Fear of daylight or sunshine. ~ Cullens

Sitophobia or Sitiophobia- Fear of food or eating. (Cibophobia) ~ Cullens mostly RoseCibophobia- Fear of food.(Sitophobia, Sitiophobia) ~ Cullens mostly Rose

Hemophobia or Hemaphobia or Hematophobia- Fear of blood. ~ Cullens (mostly Jasper)/Bella

Epistaxiophobia- Fear of nosebleeds. ~ Cullens/Bella

Necrophobia - a fear of dying or loved ones dying ~ Cullens/Bella

Polyphobia- Fear of many things. ~ Cullens/Bella.

~~Main diagnoses~~

Esme ~ Phobic-a person suffering from a phobia -An unreasonable sort of fear that can cause avoidance and panic. Phobias are a relatively common type of anxiety disorder.

Edward ~ Schizophrenic {listen carefully and a little voice will tell you} A psychotic disorder characterized by loss of contact with the environment, by noticeable deterioration in the level of functioning in everyday life, and by disintegration of personality expressed as disorder of feeling, thought (as delusions), perception (as hallucinations), and behavior —called also _dementia praecox. _Hearing voices and talking with these voices.

Bella ~ Dependent personalities Disorders. Passive dependent, Inability to make their own decisions, abandonment fears, seldom disagree/totally submissive to mate, usually told what/when/where/ how to do things.

Jasper ~ Mood Disorder. Mood swings, emotional disorders, major depressions, bipolar disorders, dysthymic disorder (minor depression).

Alice ~ Obsessive compulsion **Obsessions **are unwanted and disturbing thoughts, images, or impulses that suddenly pop into the mind and cause a great deal of anxiety or distress. **Compulsions** are deliberate behaviors (e.g. washing, checking, ordering) or mental acts (e.g. praying, counting, repeating phrases) that are carried out to **reduce the anxiety **caused by the obsessions./shopaholic Someone obsessed with shopping. A compulsive shopper.

Rose ~ Histrionic Disorder. Characterized by flamboyant/attention seekers "Drama Queens", often wear outlandish clothing, assume theatrical postures/gestures, use shallow terms-Darling/Babe/Cutie, emotionally shallow/self-centered/selfish, Manipulative, Females wear sexually-enticing costumes, can be but not always overly smiling/friendly/enthusiastic.

Emmett ~ Sex addict Sexual addiction refers to a phenomenon in which individuals report being unable to manage their sexual behavior./ Substance disorder- category refers to maladaptive use of drugs {steroids} or alcohol.

…

Alexander's POV.

_My name is Alexander Black Raven I have be called as family therapist for the Cullen family and the soon to be member Bella Swan. As such I have observed this family and spoken with each member as a group and as individuals. Over the course of my time with this family I have made many important discoveries into the inner workings of their problems. Above I have all of the lists and notes I have taken over my time with the family. Overall the family seems normal and calm until you start to dig into what makes them who they are as separate groups. Then things get interesting._

_And End notes. _

I can't believe I got myself into the mess! Why is it always me that get the way far out there families? I mean really the Cullens are a whole new world of crazy and then they want to add a new member; young Miss Bella Swan. Edward probably doesn't realize how lucky he is that Bella doesn't just run for the hills but instead she wants to join them? I don't get it but its not my job to understand why people love people. I'm not a marriage counselor. I have been typing on my computer to finish up my notes after this months sessions with this strange family. I took this job as a favor for my dear friend Doctor Carlisle Cullen, he came to me begging for help. Saying his family was in desperate need of a little guidance. I had no idea just how desperate he meant. I mean how did these people live together for so long already without trying to kill each other? With as many problems as this family has is a wonder they all can act so calm and normal in every day life let alone go to school/work and not give any clues as to how troubled they really are.

"Dear are you going to come to bed soon? How long have you been working on those notes?" Ruby Raven my wonderful and lovely wife asked.

"I'll be done shortly My Dear. I was just about to save and come to bed. You know you don't have to wait up for me when I have long nights like this."

"I know but I sleep better if you are next to me. So hurry up and then we both can get some sleep!" Ruby said.

As she walked back to the door to leave she paused and turned back to look at me. She looked very lovely in the dark night. The only light was coming from my laptop and the silver moon light coming from the window. She was smiling at me and I about melt. She was the love of my life and I sometimes wonder how I became so lucky as to have this perfect angel. She winked at me before quickly running from the room and closing the door behind her. That woman always gets ideas and when she does she winks. I love her little surprises and couldn't wait to rush off behind her. I quickly turn back to my laptop press SAVE and leave the thing just sitting there at my desk. I will close the program later. Right now I have better things to take care of!

…

Emmett's POV.

I was just out for a little run around town when I came across a funny looking house. The windows were huge and the door was small, the roof had about four different slopes, and who would pick that color purple for a house and with yellow trim? I swear Mom and Alice would die _again_ if they saw this house. I know I know this address but how? Oh well it doesn't matter really. But I just want to know what kind of person would live here.

Text from Alice:

_Emmett leave Dr. Alexander Black Raven's house alone! I mean it. Don't go in there, Emmett!_

_OOOOO! _Oh So its Dr. Black-Bird's house huh? Well that could explain the funkiness of the place. He is one weird dude and we have to put up with him and be on our best behaviors while he is working with our family. Now don't get me wrong… He is a nice enough guy but I don't know what good a human therapist is going to do for a house full of vampires! I mean I don't really have a problem with the guy he's almost as fun to have around as Bella is and even more so when he gets the family all riled up! _**Its great**_, except that Rosy doesn't like him much and she really isn't happy about anything he had to say to her or about her. … _its not like any of it was truly BAD_ but Rosy just doesn't like anything negative when talking about her. Hey I wonder if Dr. ABR is asleep yet … Bella is usually long gone by now. Humans are odd things when it comes to sleep…. All that wasted time! I slowly and quietly slip into his home and hear him and his wife fast asleep. I look around to find that I'm in his office. He left his computer open and on just sitting there on his desk. _Maybe I should close it down for him?_ It might be important. If he didn't save then that could be a big problem for him. I run over to the little laptop and click the mouse the lights come on and the screen pops up… _Cullen Family And Bella Swan diagnoses_. The title on the page read. It was his notes about the family and Bella. This has to be GOOD! I copy the notes and E-mail them to myself. I wanted to look and see how messed up Dr. Black-Bird really thought we were. As soon as I sent it I saved and closed the program and loaded down his laptop for him. I took off running home as soon as the little lights went out and I closes the top.

…

Edward's POV.

I can not believe that little pixie of a sister of mine. I mean she knows Emmett…. You don't tell him NOT to do things like that. HE DOES THEM! Sometimes simply out of boredom and you just gave him something to do I mean really Alice knew this! Now look what he did! Rose is pissed, Jasper is rather furious, Esme is worried, Carlisle still can't believe that Emmett did it in the first place, and my poor Bella is so confused and upset! I hate to see her upset and yet I have no idea how to explain this one! I mean how do you explain that _your Father decided that the family of vampires needed therapy and he wanted to have your soon-to-be wife join. Then it turns out that your stupid brother stole the therapist's notes and now the whole family is arguing with the notes_? Well I guess I could just tell her that but even I know that it shouldn't make sense. Then again when was anything my family did supposed to make sense.

"WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH HIM!" Rose shouted again walking away from the computer for the hundredth time. '_I mean REALLY? ME… A fear of staying single WHAT is that! I'm never gonna BE single! How can I fear it!_' " Uhhhhrrrgg!"

"AHH come on Rose! Its not that bad? Its not like he couldn't have said worse Sis." Alice said with a smirk. '_What does he know! I don't think its that bad to want everything perfect? Imperfections are unacceptable and I will not have them! Its not a FEAR_!'

"Come on Dears … Let just try to stay calm! I know some of this maybe a little upsetting but its what the Doctor feels is the problem and we need to help him help us. We will al be on our best behaviors at the next meeting and No one is to say one word about these notes! Do you understand!" Esme said with a polite smile but we all heard the threat hidden underneath. '_What I'm I going to do with these kids? How can they act normal after reading these notes! I can't believe My Emmy stole confidential documents, important notes. What have I done wrong_!'

"How can this be right! I don't fear crowds. I don't fear people! Why would he say I fear things when I only keep my distance to keep THEM safe! Its not my fault their emotions are an over load for me!" Jasper was mopping and sitting by Alice who was still seated at the computer glaring at the screen. '_It doesn't mean anything! This doctor can't possibly understand the problems and difficulties of being a vampire and having to feel the different emotions of those PEOPLE … well it doesn't matter!_' "Alice its ok, Love. Its ok!" Jasper tried comforting her again.

I swear my family going to see a human doctor was a bad idea from the very beginning and now look what it has caused! Rose is so pissed she has been taking apart every car in the garage and putting them back together just to take them apart again. She has been doing this then coming back to read the notes to yell more then goes back to start it all over again. As soon as Emmett came home he was sent to sit in the hall, Rose was even pissed at him. I'm sure he's going to be grounded for a very long time. Alice hasn't left that chair or stopped glaring since she opened the E-mail, _it was her fault she was the one that told Emmett not to go_. Jasper can't seem to figure out if comforting Alice is more important or if worrying about why Doctor Raven thinks he fears people is more important; at the movement Alice is winning in his mind as usual. I don't think I have seen Carlisle so … Well I would say angry but he's not really angry just really disappointed, at Emmett for stealing medical notes. And then there is me… Sitting on the couch watching and listening to my family rant and rave about these notes. I am holding Bella as she is curled up in my lap and she hasn't spoken since Alice read the notes out load. _I really wish she would say something_! **Anything**, just to let me know what she was so upset about! I don't want to make her talk but its really worrying me! Its been hours now and still nothing! She hasn't moved since I pulled her into my arms and nothing seems to calm her. I know my family has been talking, whinnng, or other wise trying to communicate in some way around me but all I could focus on at the moment was my poor angel. Bella was usually good at handling things. She never seemed to have much trouble with what we are and how we live as well as the dangers that came with that and that normally had me worried but right now I was more worried that this was bothering her so much? _**What could be the problem**_! Is she upset about what Dr. Raven said in his notes? Is she stressed about everyone being so angry? Is any of this the real problem or is there something else? _I don't know _and that bothered me more than anything my family was bothered by! My Bella was upset and I had no idea why or what I could or _should _do to help her! How do I help?

"Bella? …."

"I can't believe this." Bella mumbles for the thousandth time, that's all she has been able to mutter and she won't say anything else.

"Can't believe what Love?"

She blinked a few times then looked up at me with shock in her eyes. What did I say? Was she upset about something I did? Or didn't do maybe? What if she wanted me to try and comfort her more then I did? I just didn't want to push her into anything… how was I supposed to know! While I was berating myself and getting ready to apologize for what ever it was that I did or didn't do Bella sat up in my arms and looked me in the eyes. Still shocked.

"Edward? … Didn't you notice it!" Bella whispered.

"Notice what Love? What did I miss Bella?"

"I'm the most screwed up person in this whole mess! That doctor thinks I have more problems than everyone! … Go back and read it again if you don't believe me!" Bella demanded the end after the look I gave her.

She didn't understand the look I had wasn't a disbelief of her words more that I was unable to comprehend why this was what was upsetting her so much? Yes it seems that Bella's name was written down more then anyone else's, my name being a very close second, but why should this matter? I didn't understand. Bella shouldn't listen to this notes anyway, they were invalid, incorrect, and absolutely nonsense! Most of which were just repeats of the same fears only under different names. The fears themselves were totally wrong because tell me … how could Bella have a fear of blushing when she can't seem to stop when she was embarrassed. Just as she is now and the blush on her cheeks is so lovely and beautiful, I can't imagine anyone being afraid of suck a precious thing. I raised my right hand from around her to lightly brush the back of my hand against her rosy cheek. This caused her blush to darken and her eyes fell back to her hands that were fiddling in her lap.

"Bella why is this upsetting you so much?"

"You're dating a mental freak Edward! … Only this time you have doctor notes to prove it. Not only am I a mute with a defective brain but now you know just how messed up I really am." Bella never looked up and her voice was barely a strangled breath. _Was she CRYING!_

"Bella? …. Bella! Please don't cry! I don't think that, you know I don't! I love you Bella. Nothing could possibly change that! Besides Bella, my name is there almost as much as your's and it makes no difference to me because … Well what does he know! Dr. Raven doesn't know a real fear from a startle based on these notes! Bella I don't want you to cry!"

"But how can you tell me that its not true Edward! Look at them again. Go ahead! Most of them fit perfectly!" Bella was sobbing now and it was heartbreaking to watch.

"Bella, Love … How does Esme have a fear of anger? How is Rose afraid to stay single when she has Emmett? How could we all fear sleeping when we can't sleep? Or how can we fear food if at one point or anther when we have had to we eat food? How could you fear receiving praise, I compliment you all the time and you never run from me? And your fear of blushing is absurd… you blush all the time and I love it so much! Bella explain to me my fear of sinning when there is only one I have not committed? Or my fear of demos…."

"Enough! Don't finish that one! I don't want to hear that ever again. Do you understand Edward!" Bella suddenly cut me off with a yell, I didn't expect that kind of reaction and after her voice being so quiet before the sudden angry was sharp and slightly worrisome.

"Anything you want Bella! Just don't cry anymore, Love. Please I hate seeing you so upset."

"Then its agreed! It would be best for all involved if this stops. The Family Therapy meetings are over! We will no longer be seeing Doctor Alexander Black Raven. Its clearly not helping and if this is the kind of behavior that you are going to present then we will no longer subject Doctor Raven to such acts. Emmett I will expect you to give him a full apology for your intrusion and as for the rest of your punishment … I'm sure I will think of something by the time you get home tomorrow." Carlisle said, I wasn't aware that my family was have a conversation behind us until I heard the end just now.

"See Bella, No more therapy! … He couldn't possibly have helped us anyway I mean just look at us Love? A house full of vegetarian vampires and the human that is in love with the most messed up of them all!"

I tried to smile at her, I tried to calm her nerves. She had nothing to worry about. I could never think of her as anything less then perfect! She is perfect. My beautiful perfect angel! Nothing not even a therapist that deals with special cases could possibly make me see her as anything other than my Bella! I tried to comfort her to make her understand but it seems that my little joke has had the opposite effect I had intended. She wasn't laughing, she wasn't smiling; she was frowning at me and she looked like she might start crying again and any minute. _This was not what I wanted_! I just want her to be happy!

"Don't say that Edward!" Bella sounded close to tears and I swear if I could I would tear with her.

"What did I say Bella? …. What ever it is I promise I will never say it again! Just tell me what you want Bella. Just don't cry ok! Please no more crying"

"You are NOT messed up Edward!" Bella demanded looking me straight in the eyes. "I mean it Edward, you are to NEVER say that again!"

"I understand Love! … Never again! But that goes both ways then!"


End file.
